Happy Trails (Short Story)

A part of me despises anyone who’d walk through the door with another dirty deed for me to put on my conscious. Clients show up thinking they’re in a movie: men wanna be wiseguys, women wanna be femme fatales—they want me to be a hardboiled detective who cracks cases in 24 hours all while maintaining movie star good looks and delivering a slick one-liner or two. Walk-ins are a particular pain. They combined these delusions with a sense of entitlement you could only find in somebody who’d show up unannounced on a Monday morning.

Stoner Stigma

“The stigma ends tonight,” says Ian Power, the 46-year-old lifelong cannabis activist moments after becoming the first person in 95 years to legally buy recreational cannabis in Canada. He smiles wide, proudly displaying the paper bag of marijuana of which he plans to frame on his wall with a plaque reading, October 17th 2018 “We Won.” October 17th 2018 is the day cannabis became legal in Canada, and it is indeed a victory for many Canadians. Smokers congregate in parks and on street corners, places they have always smoked, but now do so without fear of persecution. Certainly, cannabis activists have made progress, but as tempting as it is to declare their decades-long struggle over, they have more work to do.

Spend Less this Christmas

With Halloween in our rearview mirror, the time for costumes, candy, and horror is over, and so begins the season of Christmas that brings with it slightly less candy and costumes, but certainly more horror. For adults all over the western world, credit card debt and the demands of the season are the scariest monsters of all. Between the pressures of shopping, cooking, socializing, and traveling, it’s no wonder why what Andy Williams calls “The Most Wonderful Time of the Year” can also be seen as the most stressful time of the year for many Canadians. And so, for the sake of our collective mental health and our wallets, this Christmas I propose we spend less, not just in terms of money, but our time and energy as well.

New Leaf (Short Story)

She was in her early 30s with dark Cuban skin and long black hair always braided down her back like an Amazon warrior. Her exercise bra displayed her modest yet perky breasts, her pants were formfitting and little by little, workout by workout, I was trying to weasel my way into them. One day after a particularly hard workout, she asked me out to lunch. We met in a local sandwich shop by Macarthur Park not far from the gym. I had her right where I wanted her, laughing and smiling at my jokes, and ooo-ing and awe-ing at my slightly embellished stories from the PI business. The one about the senator, his mistress, his Labrador, and his Labrador’s mistress had her almost out of her chair with laughter.